It made a difference to that one.

The starfish story has been stuck in my head for the last couple of weeks. 'I made a difference to that one'. The idea that you can't save them all doesn't make you feel any better when you want to save them all. 

We saw our lawyer for the first time yesterday. We are officially applying to be the parents of Miss 13.  It comes with a new set of challenges. Challenges we know about but still a bit freaky to have them pointed out. You will have to go to court. The biological parents will make accusations against you as their last ditch effort to prove they are able to be parents. There will be no more government department to help make decisions. 

But that's not the hard part. The hard bit is knowing 5/6 of her siblings don't yet have their home for life. Her brother has fabulous caregivers, her little sister thought she had new caregivers for life. But these kids come with such complicated issues that they are going to be hard to place. If the government agency are honest with potential caregivers about their needs. As it is; a little girl is about to have her life tipped upside down again because agencies didn't listen to the people who know her best. Will they be honest though...experience tells us probably not. Which will likely result in yet another break down in home, and another life possibly getting to the point where 'no one wants me' and that feeling sticking around for life. 

So there is the relief that for one child her life will become more stable and permanent ( after a length court process). But saving one starfish feels like a small dent in a monumental problem that I don't feel I have the power to change.