Mums are ALWAYS mums.

Mothers day was a day waiting to happen for a wee while.  I act as the mother, but biologically I'm not.  Miss 13 will never see me as her mother.  That was bringing an element of 'annoyance'.  

However, I read a friends blog on Friday that made me reconsider the day.  A blog that helped me to see the day for what it is.  Mothers are mothers, whether or not they still have their children.  Miss 13's mum, is still her mum, regardless of the fact that I am now the parent.  I'm sure given the opportunity again her mum would do things differently.  She still loves her.  And the day was probably bringing a fair amount go angst for her too.

So I let Miss 13 phone her mum.  I don't know what the social worker will say about it, and I don't really care.  The two of them appreciated it like I had never imagined.  I could hear the joy in her mums voice through the phone even though I was some distance away.  They only spoke positives, and I even over heard her mum asking her to wish ME a happy mothers day.  Miss 13 made it clear she wouldn't, but her mum persisted throughout the phone call "they are doing for you what I can not".  

Miss 13 told me when she got off the phone what her mum had asked her to do - but told me she wouldn't!  But it meant a lot that her mum asked to her do it. 

So this mothers day, I'm not getting hung up on the fact that Miss 13 won't acknowledge mothers day with me.  I am getting hung up on the fact that biological mothers are always mothers, and that they deserve the recognition too.  Miss 13s mother has brought to us a truly wonderful girl that I will always be thankful to have in our lives.  

We'll take foster mums day some other time!  Perhaps when we get guardianship we'll call it guardian's day.