When the system fails

Do you remember this post?
http://fosteringkidsinnz.blogspot.co.nz/2015/06/the-best-interests-of-child.html

I made it in June last year.  I expressed my thoughts extensively to the social work agency.  I expressed so strongly that I knew it wasn't going to work.  I feared for the combination of the two children.  Yet here I am.  Not even 12 months later.  Angry. So angry.

I brought home with me last night Mr 7, just for the night.  He was Mr 6 last time I wrote about him.  We haven't been allowed to see him since he moved to the caregivers him and Miss 8 were placed with in June last year.  Their religious differences left us shut out, the children homeschooled, and connections with their past lost. I want to say I told you so. I want to scream and yell and put the agency to shame.

I told them time and time and time again that the placement wouldn't work. That it would only be a matter of time until they were seeking out emergency care once again.  Only a matter of time until they realised for themselves that any of these siblings placed in the same house hold was a disaster waiting to happen.  They told me it wouldn't - they had fully interviewed the new parents and there were 100% confident it would work out.

It happened. Of course it happened.  Part of me feels a sense of wisdom, a little bit of narcissistic "I was right, you were wrong. I hate you" but the overwhelming feeling is one of absolute pain for this poor soul.

When he was dropped off to me on Friday night he ran to me and hugged. And held on.  And held on.  There was a scared and sad little boy who said to me "they quit on me too" followed by "no one wants me, do they? I am a bad person, aren't I?"  It took all of my power to look into those big brown eyes and say "there is a way bigger story behind this that is too hard to explain, but lots of people want you and love you, they just aren't the best people for you" It takes all the willpower in the world not to make a promise I can't keep.  I can't promise that the next home will be his forever home. I can't promise that he will be allowed to come and visit me often.  I can't even wrap him in my arms and say "I want you, come live with me" because, and I maintain, it is not in the best interests of the children.

But why am I the only person looking out for the best interests of these children? Why aren't the social workers getting this bit right.  How hard is it to see there is a broken little boy who in less than two years has been in at least 8 homes??? Can't they see what they're setting this boy up for.

http://www.radionz.co.nz/news/national/282623/'staggering-link'-between-cyf-care-and-crime

I just want him to find a forever home.  A home where he can be loved and loved and loved.  Where there are no other little children around that make his issues near impossible to cope with.  Where I will still get to see him. Where I can take his big sister to see him.  Where he will be with a family that is basically an extension of ours.  Why is that too big to ask?