Once a mum always a mum.

I wrote a couple of months back about biological mums. There is always that overwhelming desire to bad mouth them. To talk about the things they did to make themselves an unfit parent. 

It takes effort to change thinking on that. It takes work to make sure the words that come out of your mouth, not only when the child is around, are positive. 

After all, if it wasn't for her biological mum and the decisions she made - we wouldn't have Miss 13. But we do, and we love her. With her comes her mum. 

So I have been making more of an effort to be kind with my words and actions. Bio-mum has visitation this weekend. Likely to be the last one before our place in her family becomes permanent. 

Yes, I'm still incredibly nervous about the behaviours Miss 13 will display next week. But I am accepting the good with the bad. 

In fact, bio-mum is pretty hard up for money... And (partly because I want to make sure Miss 13 is fed... It's not always a given) we are having her for dinner before their first sleepover together in more than two years. 

Once we have eaten I will drop them at the local campsite where they will sleep and pick Miss 13 up 24 hours later. She will come home. She'll be grumpy. she'll be sad. But she will be richer for the reminders of her mothers love, and the security of her future with us. A future her mother openly encourages. For that I will be greatful.