Then tonight I said in my head several times 'it's not fair'. No it wasn't about the injustice in the world, the challenges some children are put through. So who am I to tell her to 'suck it up princess' because when I can't have what I want that's the first thing that came to mind.
What is not fair... That I even had to go through all the pros and cons for 12 hours before realising there was no way for my wish to come true.
What is not fair? That I have a job when thousands don't, and I get upset because the job I see advertised that I know immediately I will be perfect for isn't a viable option. (Mum, if you Are reading this... Don't even ask... You wouldn't have approved anyway lol!)
It's not fair that in order to have one I would have to give up the other. In order to have the job I want I would need to pay at least $300 less per week in rent. That leaves me with a stingy 1 bedroom bedsit in the wop wops. I just can't give up five bedrooms. Our house is always full. Where would those friends go when death was trying to steal them and they had no way of supporting themselves. Where would the kids go who just need a roof, a blanket and something to eat. Where the bloody hell would I go if I didn't have a home that oozed with personalities, potential and ... Well ... Headlice.
Gonna go mope now. Hate it when a dream is so close to being within reach... You just can't grasp it.
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